I occasionally get blog-crushes and writer crushes, so smitten I become with the ways with words of fashion-warriors. This time–instant crush on Cintra Wilson, who shops at the new Dolce & Gabbana store in Manhattan, so we won’t have to.

I loved the whole article in the Fashion & Style section of The New York Times (“Critical Shopper” column), but here’s a fragment that made me guffaw:

The second-floor shoe section is wrapped around an S-shaped sectional couch in black velvet. Dolce & Gabbana shoes look sensational — exotic, cruel little weapons. Sadly, they can be hit or miss in terms of adhering to a human foot. I went straight for pointy crocodile pumps, dyed arterial red ($1,825). I was salivating with a desire to feel their blood on the dance floor. Agony!

I was ready to commit $695 to pumps with chrome toes and heel shafts. For any girl who has lived among Belgian cobblestones, these shoes represent $35 a month in heel repair that could go straight to the dermatology slush fund. But the curse was upon them: they had apparently been molded on the Queen of Sheba’s goat hoof, or perhaps a ball-and-claw table leg.

Ain’t that the truth!