Hi, my name is Twinkletoes and I was a Sex and the City Addict. I have seen every episode. I have been know to coo “Hello Lover!” when I spy something particularly delectable. I went through a phase where I put together truly ridiculous outfits from stuff that I picked up at vintage stores and then wore to work, whilst telling myself that of course I did not look ridiculous. It was everyone else that was short-sighted and fashion-backward and didn’t these people know the genius of Pat Field? But see that’s the problem. SJP has gone out of her way to differentiate herself from Carrie Bradshaw, emphatically stating that her life is NOT controlled by fashion and of course her gold embroidered Fendi coat and Tartan Alexander McQueen dress are totally not CB. They are SJP all the way. I’m sure she would never wear something totally ridiculous, for no reason, right?
Unfortunately, all this BS has started to really annoy me. The princess dress at the Oscars annoyed me. The hissy fit at last year’s NYC SATC movie premiere nearly sent me over the edge. (Don’t even get me started on the horror that is, or (hopefully) was Bitten). But at least the woman who made Manolo Blahnik a household name always wear killer shoes. The kind of shoes that make a single tear roll down my jaded cheek as I gaze wistfully at them.
That was until she wore these. Not just once, shopping for groceries, but several times. She traipsed all over Fashion Week in them.
Oh wait, what’s that? You want a closer look. Well, sure.
Yes Virgina, those are cloven-toed shoes. The only thing I can say to this Maison Margiela version is this same thing I said when Nike released a cloven-toed tennis shoe back in the day: WHHHHHHHHHHHYYY? You are not a goat. It is not even comfortable to have fabric between your toes. And there you have it.