Growing Pains 111 Standardized Test
Mike: And he's tearing up the board folks ugg , this man cannot be stopped! Alright give me your best shot here Carol, I feel hot, I feel ready.
Carol: Ok. Ha ha ha! What nineteen fifty seven, Roger Coreman film, starred Pamela Duncan and Richard Garland?
Mike: What are they serious?
Carol: Aha.
Mike: "Attack of the Crab Monsters". Come on, give me a hard question Carol.
Carol: I don't believe it.
Mike: Oh wow, Carol! You remember this song? (song on the radio plays)
Carol: Oh yeah! Mom and Dad used to play this to us all the time when we were little!
Mike: Yeah! Remember what we used to do? (Mike and Carol sing and dance together
Ben and Jason come in, Jason began to dance )
Ben: I hope this isn't hereditary.
Maggie: Hey guys report cards came!
Carol: Oh yeah! Report cards came!
Maggie: Yeah. Here's yours.
Jason: Maggie, we have a child who actually likes getting report cards; where did we go wrong ugg boots ?
Carol: I don't even know why I'm so nervous...I mean I already know what I got...Yep A, A,
A, A, A, A....woooo!!!
Jason: Woooo!!
Maggie: Oh, that's great sweetie. Mike!
Maggie: C, C, C, C, C....D, B.
Jason: Well he did get one B. Phys Ed?
Maggie: You got it. What drives me crazy is that...
Jason: I know. He's not dumb.
Maggie: In first and second grade he got B's and B pluses.
Jason: Well that was before Carol came along and started getting all A's...the nerve!
Maggie: Yeah.
Jason: Well at least he had two great years. That's better than that poor guy a couple of Popes ago.
Maggie: Jason!
Jason: Maggie, maybe we're being a little too hard on him, you know not all kids have to get A's.
Maggie: But for the last couple of years it's been getting worse.
Jason: Well that's what puberty's for;
You take a difficult situation and you make it impossible ugg boots ireland .
Maggie: Where (have) you been Mike?
Mike: Oh, I thought I'd go look for Duke.
Jason: Mike, Duke ran away six months ago.
Mike: So!
Jason: And he wasn't our dog.
Mike: But what does that really mean Dad? "Our dog". I mean can one person ever really own, another living thing? I’ll get upstairs to check it.
Maggie: Hey I got a great idea. Why don't we all take a look at what's in this envelope.
Mike: Oh, Ok. "If your name is Mike Seaver you may have already won two million Dollars".
Hey look Mom, before you get too upset, ah, you should know that some of these grades might be wrong.
Maggie: Mmmm.
Jason: What scares us, is that some of them might be right.
Mike: Hey I got a C average. That's not bad, it's average.
Maggie: Is that what you wanna be Mike? Average?
Mike: Well it's a higher C, so actually it's a little above average.
Jason: Don't they have C pluses for that?
Mike: Well it's not that high!
Maggie: You could do better than this. Can't you ugg ireland ?
Mike: It's not my fault Mom, I have a personality conflict with my teacher.
Jason: Well Mike, you have about the same grade for six different subjects, with six different teachers.
Mike: I know. The profession just seems to attract people who are difficult to get along with.
Maggie: Mike! How many times do we have to go through this? I mean you're just gonna have to work a little harder.
Mike: I am working hard!
Maggie: Then why is it every time I go up to your room when you're supposed to be studying, you're either napping or throwing darts.
Mike: It's how I unwind.
Maggie: Mike!
Jason: Look Mike! Are you saying you're trying as hard as you can?
Mike: Yeah!
Jason: So these C's are honestly the best you can do?
Mike: No, I can better than C's Dad.
Jason: Well Mike. What about this D in Geometry?
Mike: I dunno.
Jason: Are the classes too hard for you? I mean you rather be in a Math section that's a little less demanding?
Mike: Dad, I can do it! I mean I'm passing aren't I? Look you don't have to go putting me in with the rejects!
Carol: Hey Mike! Wanna finish our game?
Mike: Er, no, I wouldn't want to keep you from admiring you A’s...please going ahead, don't let me stop you ugg bailey button .
Carol: Come on Mike!
Mike: Ah come on, don't be modest Carol! Let's share this special moment. Oh I'm so proud of you Carol...Algebra, A. Social Studies, A. Advanced Nerdiness , A plus.
Carol: I'm not a nerd!
Mike: Hey Carol! There's nothing wrong with being a nerd. I mean without nerds, who would buy all nerds, who would buy all the back-to-school supplies? Who would dig the guys on the Math team? And who would raise their hand in class and go, "Ooh ooh ooh ooh!!!"
Carol: Well, you're just jealous because you never get good grades!
Mike: Look if I studied, I could probably get all A's.
Carol: You couldn't get an A in lunch as a second language!
Mike: Oh that's funny carol! You ever considered being a stand-up? Maybe you could do like Chemistry comedy and stuff.
Carol: Oh you're such a jerk. If you could get such good grades then, don't you study?
Mike: Because I have better things to do.
Carol: Like what? Like getting Lloyd Kreager to laugh milk out of his nose.
Mike: No! Like hanging out with friends. Which certain people don't have.
Carol: Yeah well, we'll just see how smart you are on Monday, won't we ugg boots sale ?
Mike: Why? What's Monday?
Carol: It's the day the whole school takes the Idaho standardized test.
Mike: So! If I study, I'll probably get the highest grade in school.
Carol: You can't study for this test bogey brain! It's an aptitude test.
Mike: I know! What's an aptitude test?
Carol: It's basically an IQ test to see how smart you are....or in your case, how smart you aren't.
Teacher: Alright now, listen up! This is the Idaho Standardized test!
Richie: God I hate these tests. I hate number two pencils. I hate this whole experience.
Mike: Hey look calm down will you. This isn't such a big deal.
Richie: Not a big...not a big deal. Tell that to the hives that are breaking out on my thighs
Mike: You have hives on your thighs?
Richie: You wanna see 'em?
Mike: No! No!
Teacher:Richie;Richie: Oh my God ugg classic cardy !
Mike: This test doesn't even count on your grades. I mean what difference does it make what you get?
Richie: Are you kidding? This is an IQ test, this is ten times more important than your grades!
Mike: Wait what are you talking about?
Richie: This test decides once and for all how smart we are. I mean after today, our parents will know how stupid we are. Our brothers and sisters will know how stupid we are. I can only assume, the whole state of Idaho will know how stupid we are!
Mike: Our parents get these results?
Richie: I'll never hear the end of it. "Poor Richie, he's just not as smart as his brother David.
Our David is pre-law at Princeton this year. Oh hi Richie! Could you take out the garbage please. We're hoping he can do it professionally some day".
Mike: Richie, what do you care about your brother? I mean so he's a nerd. Every family's got a nerd.
Richie: Hang on, that's right, you've got Carol. She's a genius! You're gonna look like a tree stump next to her.
Mike: No I'm not! Cause for one thing, I'm just as smart as she is. And for another thing, I happen not to believe in these tests. You know what I do? I don't even read the questions; I just fill in the computer dots in a pretty pattern like this.
Richie: You're crazy! What are you doing?
Teacher: Alright! You may begin!
Mike: Oh, it's a self portrait. They're gonna love this is in Idaho.
Jason: Alright Mr Ellis. Is there anything else you'd like to talk about before we stop for today ugg classic short ?
Mr Ellis: No! Everything's just great.
Jason: Good. Ok, well I think we're making some real progress here with your problem.
Mr Ellis: What problem's that?
Jason: Well Mr. Ellis, we both know, don't we, that you're an habitual liar.
Mr Ellis: No I'm not.
Jason: Mr. Ellis!
Mr Ellis: Ok, Ok! Don't pressure me like this. My whole life's going down the drain.
Jason: Ah but just a minute ago you said that everything is just great.
Mr Ellis: No I didn't.
Jason: Well then, we certainly do have a lot to talk about next time Mr. Ellis.
Mr Ellis: What next time? I'm never coming back here again!
Jason: Whatever you say.
Mr Ellis: Fine! See you next Wednesday.
Jason: Sure, Ok.
Alright Ben let's do it ugg classic tall !
Ben: Oh Dad!


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